The Power of Personal Boundaries: Transforming Relationships and Boosting Self-Worth

What if guarding your personal space could transform your relationships and boost your sense of self-worth? We explore the powerful impact of setting healthy personal boundaries as we share our own stories, from struggling with people-pleasing to learning the value of protecting our time and peace. Discover how boundaries are an expression of self-respect, not a sign of unkindness, as we dissect the dynamics of social interactions with family, friends, and even within marriage.

Join us as we unpack the complexity of establishing boundaries in relationships and the crucial role they play in maintaining our identity. Through personal anecdotes, we reveal how prioritizing others' needs over our own can slowly erode our self-worth and lead to a loss of identity. We share insights on how mutual respect and understanding, fostered by clear boundaries, can enhance relationships instead of creating conflicts, turning them into a foundation for personal growth, better connections, and even more attractive dynamics in dating.

Dive into the art of articulating and safeguarding boundaries, as we discuss the importance of clear communication and the courage to address boundary violations. Learn how open conversations about personal limits not only strengthen relationships but also minimize misunderstandings. By supporting each other in this journey, we hope to empower you to have meaningful discussions about boundaries, paving the way for healthier interactions and a community that respects personal needs and limits. Engage with us and share your experiences in the comments — your voice is vital in this ongoing conversation.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Setting Healthy Personal Boundaries
• 6:43 Establishing Healthy Relationship Boundaries
• 20:40 Articulating and Guarding Healthy Boundaries
• 28:44 Empowering Healthy Relationship Boundaries

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

What's up let's Dig crew. Thank you for joining this conversation. Hey, if you are enjoying these conversations, if they are adding value to you, can you do us a favor? Can you subscribe? Can you like? Can you comment? Also, leave us a review on podcast, Apple or Spotify. We love those reviews. They really help us and, honestly, they just really encourage us to keep doing what we're doing.

Speaker 2: 0:22

Yeah, I think reviews to also help other people who are still on the fence or looking for good podcasts and looking for good conversations. I know for me I look at reviews on anything.

Speaker 1: 0:32

That's true. Do a little mustache.

Speaker 2: 0:35

A little mustache is your mark.

Speaker 1: 0:37

Yeah, something I don't know what it was.

Speaker 2: 0:38

I'm hot and sweaty because I'm wearing this really heavyweight hoodie.

Speaker 1: 0:42

It's true and it's not as cold Y this really heavyweight hoodie, it's true, and it's not as cold. Y'all know, pierre likes to freeze me out for recordings and today he didn't, so that makes sense that you're sweating, because I'm comfortable Speaking of this hoodie, though.

Speaker 2: 0:51

we just got it. It just came in, and I think it's time to go live with this hoodie.

Speaker 1: 0:55

I think so too, it's fire.

Speaker 2: 0:59

We've been working on it for Turn around. You guys need to see the back Show them.

Speaker 1: 1:01

Show the people. You guys see this back right here. Show the people, no turn more babe, it didn't work.

Speaker 2: 1:06

Oh man, can you guys see that right there? Y'all see that. Hey, I can see that a little bit. Hey, that's the hoodie right there. So you guys already know that. You guys already know what this means. I already know. It's the story of every single christian, every believer. So if you're trying to find a way to tell your story about what god has done for you, get this hoodie. It's live right now.

Speaker 1: 1:33

So on, shopify on our website on instagram on youtube, facebook, um hey but I like today's conversation quality so matter of fact, speaking of this hoodie, old life is gone.

Speaker 2: 1:42

A new life is here. We're going to talk about boundaries.

Speaker 1: 1:45

Okay, but we let's dig, okay, let's dig, let's dig, okay. So we're talking about boundaries today, right, and I've had a lot of conversations going on in relationships that I'm walking with friends or people around me. I'm talking about boundaries a lot lately and I said to a friend the other day I said the older you get, the more boundaries you have to implement. And it's really true, the older you get, you have to set boundaries with people that you never really imagined, like I don't know your mom and dad, like you never imagined that you'd have to set boundaries with your mom and dad. But the older you get, the more you have to, because you go off when you start your own family and you have to create that healthy boundary right. You have to set boundaries with family members that may live a different lifestyle or maybe they just don't live the same as you, and so it creates a little conflict. So healthy boundaries are the way to go about that.

Speaker 1: 2:38

So I was doing some research about this topic and the first video I watched was signs that you have weak or a lack of boundaries. And the first two characteristics she described were so embarrassingly my character, my personality type that I was embarrassed. I wanted to turn it off actually, but the first one she said was a sign of lack of boundaries is that you have trouble making decisions. And I am that they. She said that if you kind of overthink a decision or you kind of go back and forth, people with that characteristic can have trouble setting boundaries. And that is me for sure. It's, it's 100%.

Speaker 1: 3:25

But, you don't? Do you struggle? Do you have a problem making decision or do you have a hard time ever like landing on a decision? No, Ever.

Speaker 2: 3:35

No, I don't Are you, are you? Oh, you want me to elaborate?

Speaker 1: 3:40

I mean no, you don't have to.

Speaker 1: 3:42

You literally don't have a problem with it. Okay so, okay. So the other one was so the first one is that you have a hard time making decisions. The second one was that you're a people pleaser. Pierre, do you ever struggle with being a people pleaser? I know you don't. So I'm just going to talk to all the let's Dig crew because Pierre does not fall into this category. But I have a hard time people pleasing and I have a hard time making decisions.

Speaker 1: 4:08

But I have learned as I've gotten older that boundaries say more about how I respect myself and the value of myself. More than that, I'm like, not a nice person because people pleasers. That's what we struggle with. Right Of what do other people think of us? Um, we struggle with if you are an empath, a feeler I'm a strong, strong feeler. That is hard for me to. I feel like I'm being mean to you or I feel like I'm going to hurt your feelings, um, but I have really really leaned into learning how to set that boundary and it doesn't reflect anything of how I feel about you, how it actually reflects more of how I feel about myself, and that is that I value myself. I have to protect my time or my space or my peace or whatever reason I'm making that boundary.

Speaker 1: 4:59

It actually reflects more on my self-worth, more than anything.

Speaker 2: 5:03

Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, I don't really have issues of setting boundaries. I actually have more boundaries than I'd like to admit.

Speaker 1: 5:13

Hmm that's interesting.

Speaker 2: 5:15

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 5:15

Talk about that, would you no? And there's a boundary, like right away he's like no, I won't talk about it.

Speaker 2: 5:22

You thought I came here to talk.

Speaker 1: 5:24

What'd you come here to do? Just wear a sweatshirt and look pretty.

Speaker 2: 5:27

Hey, that's right, and it's California.

Speaker 1: 5:34

So I do identify as pretty. You're weird, okay, wait. So what would you? What would you say to someone who is having a hard time setting those boundaries? So I'm a person who I've had to learn and that has been a very big challenge for me to learn how to set boundaries For someone who does not struggle with it, who it comes very easily to. What would you say to someone not me, not your wife, but what would you about themselves?

Speaker 2: 5:52

Meaning I just want to be this open, no boundaries, clear, ready to go left and right, up and down, because I don't want people to feel that I'm rejecting them, and to me, I think the opposite. I admire people who have boundaries. So I think people who have a hard time setting boundaries like for you, you have a hard time with that because you care so much about making me happy, pleasing me and how I see you, and I think you lose sight of how you should see yourself and that you should look at yourself and say I deserve boundaries.

Speaker 2: 6:43

I demand boundaries, but it's a lot of times you put others' perspective towards you above your perspective towards yourself.

Speaker 1: 6:50

It's twofold. I put other people's perspective of me before myself, but I also just put others before myself, in general and not to a healthy point, and that's what I've really had to learn. That was part of our marriage. Therapy was that I had put you first so much that I had actually sacrificed a lot of my self-worth, but also my self-identity and like who I was as a self, and that was actually another character. Flaw of what they said of weak and loose boundaries was that these are people that tend to lose themselves in motherhood in a job, like they lose their identity because they put all of the other things before themselves.

Speaker 2: 7:34

Yeah, I noticed that in in you even when we first got married. I mean our first few places that we've lived in, like a lot of the places of stuff that ended up on the wall, the furniture, the ottoman, the carpets, the rugs, everything, side tables A lot of it was me making the last decision and not because I felt stronger about it. It's just you were afraid to feel strong about it, so you were just so open. So we're like where should we put the rug, or how should the couch look? And cause, you wanted to just collab on this, which is great. That's what we do. And I'm like I kind of like it, like this. And then I'd say what if it was over there? And you're like we could try that and it's like no, give pushback. But you worked so hard, just to people, please, and you didn't even have those boundaries, so I think you lost sight of where those lines were for you yeah, it is very easy.

Speaker 1: 8:29

Yeah, you're right, I don't want to. Uh, naturally I don't want to ruffle feathers. Yeah, naturally I.

Speaker 2: 8:36

I don't really want tension I love a good chicken fight chicken fight a dog fight. Yes, dogs don't have feathers, that's true. What? That's why I was going off of the ruffle feathers.

Speaker 1: 8:52

Oh, I was not there with you. I was so confused Okay, got it, but I didn't want to ruffle feathers. Get it, chicken fight, got it. I don't like that tension is specifically with you. Actually, with other people I've grown to learn how to have tension and it doesn't mean fighting, it doesn't mean arguing like I can have tension and it's okay, I've learned that, but I never wanted that with you for sure. Yeah. So if you want, if you have a strong feeling like I just felt, like okay, it's fine, like I'm not gonna lose sleep about where the couch is at night, um, and that's fine. But I think, with boundaries and as I've grown, I've realized that boundaries actually help mold healthier relationships, right, right, especially when it comes to expectations and like, hey, this is what I need from you or this is what I. I don't have this space for you, especially being in ministry learning to set healthy boundaries with people, but can you like expand on how you think that boundaries actually make healthier relationships?

Speaker 2: 10:03

Yeah, I think I said it earlier. I think boundaries are attractive, and so we talked about this in his one episode of think about a guy who's pursuing a girl. What makes him want her more is the fact that she's actually putting up walls and giving him the cold shoulder. That's crazy.

Speaker 2: 10:26

Or rejecting him makes him want her more that's wild not these loose chicks that that that be out here all giving it all up and all over the place in the streets. That's not attractive, it's not. That's not attractive, it's like. You know, I hate when we're walking down the streets or driving down the street and I see a young girl dressed a certain way.

Speaker 2: 10:49

When we're walking and we see on the high or like on the sidewalk, every single time I see a young girl on the sidewalk dressed a certain way, and I was like man, that girl probably doesn't have a dad, or that girl probably has a mom that sees herself in a very low manner, where it teaches her to show it all, so that when guys see you, they already know all that you're working with. And to me I'm like and then girls wouldn't get mad that guys address them based off of how they're dressed, like girls, you, you, you walk into a room or you dress a certain way or all your stuff is out and all your stuff is showing, it's very appearing, it's suggestive. So don't get mad if men address you how you are dressed. And so what I'm saying is, I think, when boundaries are set up in a very high way and not just putting yourself out there and just showing everything. It gives different layers for someone to actually show themselves in relationships, and then you get to grow through some seasons.

Speaker 1: 11:55

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 11:55

So young people that are always dating and they're pursuing marriage. I always tell them go through a few seasons, Absolutely, Someone, you just met someone. And they let it all out all at the same time, all same week, all of the same season I'm like no that's not true. Wait till you go. Wait till you go through some things, then it will strengthen the relationship. How do you do that? It's setting up some boundaries. It's setting up layers, setting up some levels, giving someone access to a next level of who you are yeah and so I think boundaries are very important.

Speaker 2: 12:25

I think I've seen girls scare guys away because they want to open up their mouth and say everything, so true, and like yo put, wait, hold up, pause, chill, wait Too fast, too fast, Too fast. Let somebody learn that about you, Like let it show up in a relationship. And so that's my thoughts, man, I really do think that boundaries are healthy for every single one of us, I mean even for us. Right, Do not disturb on a phone. D and D that's a feature that we use all the time. That's boundaries. Yeah, that people have access to me 24 seven is not healthy. Anyone that's on my team, the people that I serve with the people that I work with, like, they honor and respect boundaries, especially when I tell them hey, bro, sorry I couldn't pick up your call. And here's why.

Speaker 1: 13:09

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 13:09

I was with my kids Right, or spending time with my wife, or that very last hour of the day I spend time for me and the Lord. Yeah, People say oh man, that's messed up bro. No, your relationship gets stronger and the person respects you for that.

Speaker 1: 13:22

That's true. I even think about boundaries with our 10-year-old right now. Yeah, setting boundaries with how long he's playing video games, how long he's doing this, how long he's doing that. Boundaries only create healthy relationships with things and with people. So if there's a boundary that we set of how much he's on his iPad, how much he's on his Xbox or how much he's talking to a person, those are only creating healthy habits for him. So how much more would it be for adults to have boundaries with how much you eat sweets, how much you stay up late or whether you go to bed at night, like there is boundaries in every aspect of our life. So for them to make us healthier in our habits of going to the gym, what we're eating, it would be the same thing like crossing over to relationships.

Speaker 2: 14:13

Yeah, yeah, I think there's also spiritual boundaries too. I think so many people give access to the devil, people give access to demonic influences because they don't set boundaries.

Speaker 1: 14:29

For an example, I was going to say give us an example.

Speaker 2: 14:32

Remember that show Scandal we used to watch? Yes, scandal.

Speaker 1: 14:37

Olivia Pope.

Speaker 2: 14:38

Scandal was a show that, right there, in front of you, endorsed people at all levels to have affairs and people rooting for the cheaters? Sure did. And you're literally watching it. It's entering through your eye gate, into your soul, into your mind, and the show is actually rewarding it. And what's what's happening? Is it's opening up your mind, is it's suggesting something, and then, in the end, they win. So you see this thing that is televised, something that is shown to you, and you see how they make. You see, yo, this thing happens.

Speaker 1: 15:16

It works. They are happy together.

Speaker 2: 15:18

And I think all the times that in my life and in our marriage that I've considered the thought of like, what would it look like to have an affair? What would it look like if we're divorced? All that happened during seasons when I did not set up boundaries for things to have these influences. It was the shows that we're watching, the stuff that was reading, friends that are around, People that were around that talked about it, People that I was following on social media talking about it. So I had to set up boundaries In order to protect this, to protect our marriage. I needed boundaries.

Speaker 1: 15:56

Let me think about it. If you get a pet which I know you don't know nothing about getting a dog but if you get a dog.

Speaker 2: 16:02

We had a dog before and we had boundaries. That mug was not allowed on our bed, straight mug. Actually that's true. We did have a dog and you didn't let the Rover had to be outside.

Speaker 1: 16:11

The dog was not allowed on the furniture.

Speaker 2: 16:13

His name was not Rover. You know, us Haitians, we don't really have dogs, unless we have dogs to chase away the cats or to scare people off or scare their neighbors, which is like beware, beware, large dog man, your dog ain't large, little tiny dog anyways.

Speaker 1: 16:31

But if you think about, when you get a pet, what is the first thing that you do to keep them safe? You get them a gate, you get them a cage, you get them a fence around your yard.

Speaker 2: 16:41

Leave them in there day and night oh, my word no but, also.

Speaker 1: 16:45

That's what Haitians do. Californians treat them as human beings, which is wild, you get them a pillow. California. People are crazy with their dogs. You get them a massage. Anyways, I still want a dog.

Speaker 2: 16:57

We got kids, bro, same. Thing.

Speaker 1: 16:59

They are similar. But I'll just say if you want to protect something, you put a fence around it. That's good. If you want to protect your life, you need to put a fence around it. You need to put it to where you can protect your person, your spirituality, your emotions, your feelings.

Speaker 2: 17:22

You need to put a fence around it to protect the outward influences from coming in and getting inside influences from coming in and getting inside. It's the the higher your boundary around something is, the higher of respect that you have for that thing, it's the higher the love you have for it. So people who do not have boundaries or set boundaries around certain things tells me you do not love that thing, you protect something that you love. It's true. So you set boundaries around your heart, you set boundaries around your mind. That's why, even for us, as Christian, in Ephesians 6, paul said to put on the helmet of salvation. Yeah, I see that as also boundaries around your mind Absolutely. That people want to come talk trash or the enemy wants to come. Put thoughts in your mind Absolutely. That people want to come talk trash or the enemy wants to come. Put thoughts in your mind.

Speaker 2: 18:06

And he's saying set a boundary, boundary, a helmet to protect it. And what do you do? Day and night? You meditate on the salvation, our salvation. You meditate on the word of God. He said put on the breastplate of righteousness. That's a boundary around your heart. That means live right Absolutely when you're living right. So you protect your heart. To me, that's boundaries to me. And I think people who want to live all loose, people who want to let other people who trigger them in their lives and have these weird codependent, enabling, dysfunctional relationships. That tells me you really don't love yourself, because if you loved yourself and cared for yourself, you would do whatever it takes to protect yourself.

Speaker 1: 18:56

Yeah, that means putting boundaries around people who piss you off, people who get in your mind that's true or who influence you in a negative way, Like if I'm around someone and I start thinking a certain way when I'm around them, I have to set a boundary of like no, I cannot let myself be around you too much because I feel your influence or I feel what you deal with, or I feel what you're still working through and I can't protect myself if I'm constantly around you.

Speaker 1: 19:31

So let's give some practicality. How do you encourage someone to approach setting a boundary? So like, for instance, how are you going to encourage, how do you tell someone okay, if you are realizing that you need to set a boundary with a person?

Speaker 1: 19:48

in a relationship, whatever it is if it's a friendship, a romantic relationship, a work relationship, whatever it is, a family relationship. What do you tell them when they go to approach that person? What's an advice that you would give them that they know they need to set this boundary? What do you tell them when they're like I don't want to have this conversation and I don't know how to have this conversation. I don't know Bro. I think Pierre gets fired today. Guys, Pierre's fired from his job.

Speaker 2: 20:18

I got boundaries. No, here's what I think man Like for me. I tell this to people all the time. I'm like if you want me to better serve you, if you want me to be the best person in your life that you need from me, then these are the things that I have to do to be healthy, to be able to help you. So, for example, yesterday I had a meeting with somebody and I had to push the meeting 30 minutes. And when they finally came into the meeting, I apologized. I said hey, I'm sorry that I had to push meeting 30 minutes, but here's why I needed it. I said I was mentally heavy, mentally weighted. I had a lot of meetings I mean, I had five before then.

Speaker 2: 21:03

I was going through so much, my mind was so fried, and I told that person in order for me to come into our meeting with giving you 100% of my attention and a clear mind, I literally needed some time to reset. So here I am, I extended, I pushed back the boundary I know we're supposed to meet at 11 o'clock. I said can we do at least 1130? And when they came in, I said here's why In order for you to have my undivided attention, I needed to reset, and so I think people just need to get better. I was about to say a certain thing that I know someone's going to come for me, so I'm not going to lie. I think people need to get better at articulating why they're putting up fences or why they're putting up walls or why they're putting up boundaries Because somebody can get offended that you put up a boundary against me.

Speaker 2: 21:54

But if you articulate it and said, hey, no, no, no. Here's why I'm setting up some boundaries, because I want to better support this. I want our relationship to get stronger. In order to do that, here's some things that I need to do for me, so that I can love you. Jesus said love your neighbor as yourself.

Speaker 1: 22:12

Which means you got to love yourself first.

Speaker 2: 22:14

So that's what I would say. I would encourage people get better at articulating why you're putting up boundaries so that people wouldn't just be upset and frustrated and be like you're just going to put boundaries up on me like that. Well, no, well, yes, but here's why, and when you know that it's actually for the benefit of both, our relationship, we good.

Speaker 1: 22:34

Okay, that's a really good answer. On the flip side, what do you think is a sign that a boundary needs adjusted? Like that someone is crossing that boundary or that it's not being effective? What is that? What does that look like in a relationship where someone is crossing that line? Or maybe I've set the boundary with you and they're not respecting it? Like what? How do you approach that? What does that look like?

Speaker 2: 23:00

Yeah, so my first mentor used to always tell me he called me Petey. He said, petey, in life you always need to make sure that you set the bar and you guard the bar. Wow, that's really good. He did always say that I think so many people set the bar, they set it and forget it, and the bar starts to drop. They don't come back and recalibrate, they don't come back and check on it. They don't do pulse checks. They check on it every other year. So true.

Speaker 2: 23:28

He said tell me you set the bar and you guard it. And he said depending on what season would determine how much it needs to be guarded.

Speaker 1: 23:38

Interesting.

Speaker 2: 23:39

So I think people just need to get better at guarding the bar, because if you guard the bar, you will know that, hey, this bar right now needs more reinforcement. Yeah.

Speaker 1: 23:49

Something for me, too, is that I have learned that the longer I let someone cross that boundary, the harder the conversation is. But the first time it happens I don't have to come hard. I can just be gentle, which is more my personality type. So that's my opportunity.

Speaker 1: 24:07

For me who's a people pleaser, for me who doesn't really enjoy conflict, I'm going to take that opportunity that very first time that line is crossed and say I'm going to take a deep breath and I'm going to say, hey, remember when I asked you about that? And they're going to go oh, my gosh, I'm so sorry, I totally forgot. No, that's okay. I just want to remind you that, by far, for people pleasers and people who don't watch conflict, that's the moment, that is your window, because if you keep letting it happen, that conversation only gets harder. Because then conversation only gets harder, because then what are you going to do after six months and being like, then you pull out the thing and they don't even remember they're they had. Literally most of the time they didn't do it intentionally and most of the time they don't remember that you gave that boundary.

Speaker 1: 24:49

So for the first time I'm going to take that window because I know that conversation is way easier to get through than if I wait six months and I'm miserable for the whole six months thinking why do they not respect it? Why they not do that they forgot or they are actually intentionally doing it, and then I really need to have a conversation.

Speaker 2: 25:09

And what it does in your heart, caring and harboring this thing for months.

Speaker 1: 25:13

Oh my gosh.

Speaker 2: 25:13

Then I get miserable when you could have probably just addressed it early on, when they remembered you remember it was clear to say hey, remember last week we talked about oh yeah, that's right, right, yep, right. It's just I don't understand why people like wait so long to adjust or correct certain things, especially with people that they're in relationship with.

Speaker 2: 25:29

That's the window, guys, there's so many windows that present themselves, and so I think that's what it is. I think people just need to learn how to we as people, we as people, I'm saying we because I fall to that need to continue setting the bar but guarding it, protecting it.

Speaker 2: 25:44

If someone comes at it, remind them that it's there Right, and find a way on how to remind it. It don't need to be all the time of just like telling people about your boundaries and stuff like that. And bar right and guard, cause we've talked about that before.

Speaker 1: 25:57

People walking in with their room, with their boundaries. Wait, I didn't even approach the boundary yet.

Speaker 2: 26:01

Yeah, like, that's like going on Instagram and say, if anybody needs me, my phone's on D&D. Nobody needs you right now, bro. Nobody was like. Nobody's trying to hit you up or like you walk into a room and be like FYI, no one asked me out to dinner, I'm no one asked you out to dinner. No one's talking about food do you want to?

Speaker 2: 26:23

go out to dinner like is that, is that, is that what you want? Right? Like is so. So, yeah, there's, there's that. But I really do think this is a cool conversation, because I think it's something that we all need to get better at, I agree. Uh, just figuring out how do we, how do we steward our relationships? And one way is by creating really solid lines. Solid lines, if someone's in your life and they're always triggering you, like if you really care for them and you really want to protect your heart, then it's a disservice if you don't set up boundaries. If you need help setting up boundaries and reach out to somebody, ask somebody like you know what I mean, pray about it, ask that the God, that the God that created your mind, can actually show you like, okay, here's the type of words that you can use, but I really do think that setting boundaries can really help relationships be stronger. Um, just in general, man.

Speaker 1: 27:15

Yeah, I, um, I love this conversation because it's always evolving. Every season you go through it will change. I feel like we're in a season right now where our family, like dynamic, is changing, your workload is changing, my workload is changing, so it's a shift. And so then that makes me realize I have to change different boundaries. Um, and then it goes to what you said to you of we actually just have to learn how to be better communicators to have that conversation about boundaries. I just have to get better at communicating. Hey, this is what I need to be healthy, so I'm going to ask that we don't do this. Or hey, this is what I need to do for me.

Speaker 1: 27:59

So from now on, I'm actually not going to be on my phone after nine. I'm sorry. If you need to text me, you can text me. You can text me. My phone will be on D and D and I'll respond to you first thing in the morning. Like I have one client at the salon and she constantly texts me at 10 PM. That's a boundary. You don't get access to me. I will respond to you at 7 am tomorrow morning, but I do not want to open that door because she's done it multiple times. I'm not giving her that access to be able to think that that's okay, it's a boundary. I'll respond to you tomorrow in the morning, but that's what I have to do for me and for the health of my family. So it's it's learning to protect myself, for me and for my family. So, anyways, we love y'all.

Speaker 1: 28:44

We hope that this helps you have great conversations, have conversations with the people you are in relationship with. Have friend conversations with your friends. Your, your person. You're dating and what do healthy boundaries look like for you? Ask someone that you care about hey, do you need something different from me to be a boundary for you? Like, give them the opportunity We've had the conversation all the time of like, hey, what do you need from me?

Speaker 1: 29:09

So if I'm feeling like you're, you're struggling with something, if I said, hey, do you need to, like, turn your phone off at a certain time? Do you need me to help in some way so that this doesn't happen again? Like, offering up the conversation so that maybe someone who's feeling a little nervous about having the conversation of a boundary has that open door to say, hey, what do you need from me so that you can encourage them to set that boundary because knowing that it creates a healthy relationship. So we love y'all. We hope this gives you some good conversation to have comment down below. We are always talking to y'all in the comments. We love y'all. So thank you for being here and keep digging.