Listen To This Before You Date | 3 Life-Changing Tips For Dating

Are you tired of feeling lost and undervalued in your relationships? In our latest episode, we reveal the essential advice we wish we could have given our younger selves about dating and staying true to your core values. Hear a poignant listener story about the heartache that comes from dating someone with mismatched beliefs, and learn why being upfront about your values from the start is non-negotiable for a healthy relationship.

Choosing the right voices to guide you in your romantic journey is crucial, and we share our own experiences with this delicate process. Discover the wisdom we garnered from pivotal figures like our mothers, youth pastors, and our spiritual practices. We emphasize the need to be selective about whose advice you take, avoiding the pitfalls of confusion that come with too many conflicting opinions.

Authenticity is key, and we discuss the importance of being your true self in relationships. Reflect on the long-term impact of sidelining your personal gifts and passions for the sake of a relationship, and the ease with which one can lose their identity. From sharing your dreams and quirks early on to navigating the excitement of dating, this episode is packed with insights to help you build genuine and fulfilling relationships. Don't miss out on our heartfelt guidance for approaching dating with integrity and self-awareness.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Dating and Relationship Values
• 12:18 Choosing Wise Relationship Voices
• 21:45 Sharing Authentic Self in Relationships
• 25:16 Authenticity in Dating and Relationships
• 29:32 Navigating the Excitement of Dating

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

What's up y'all? Welcome to let's Dig the Podcast. Okay, whether you are dating, you're trying to get back on the dating game. Maybe you're even a parent and you're giving advice to your kids about dating. What else? What else are we talking about? Like, who else needs to hear this?

Speaker 2: 0:14

The single ones that want to date somebody.

Speaker 1: 0:17

All right, the single. Okay, I think I said that in the first category, did you? I don't know. Okay, stop searching, stop clicking around. This is for you right now. We just had somebody send us a message, right Cause we, we like we put out a poll the other day saying access anything, and someone asks us, like what was the question?

Speaker 2: 0:33

They asked us what do you wish that you could say to your younger selves while you were still dating?

Speaker 1: 0:41

And that is such a good question, shout out to one of our subscribers, our followers on Instagram. It was a good question, right, and I actually liked that question because we often talk about that all the time. Man, I wish I would have known that when I was younger. And so for us, some of the stuff. We still make those adjustments even now as we're married, but we do give advice to other people that are dating, um, some things that they should know. So we wrote down three things that you probably must know when you're dating, while you've been dating for a while, let's say, you're seeking for marriage, which, first of all, if you're dating and you're not seeking marriage, I'm not sure what you're doing. Stay tuned for the third one. The third one is my favorite one. That one, right there, honestly struck our marriage when we realized at a very late time, you know in our marriage, that we're like yo. Why did we not discover this a lot earlier? That's true.

Speaker 3: 1:30

Ready, that's true. All right.

Speaker 2: 1:32

Let's dig.

Speaker 1: 1:33

Well, okay. So the very first thing, the very first thing that we would tell to our younger self when we were dating, is I forgot it, I'm late, you're like and I don't remember. Okay, the very first thing that I would say to anyone that's dating or you're seeking to date right, is don't, don't undervalue your values. So true, don't undervalue your values. Here's what I mean by that is a lot of times we get into the dating scene, or we've been dating for a while, or we're with somebody and there's certain things that's very important to us and we feel like, okay, I don't want to scare this person away, so we hold back.

Speaker 1: 2:15

Or let's say it's our faith. That's a very big value to some of us, and some people are like I don't know if they're a Christian too. I don't know if they believe too, I don't want to invite them to church yet. And you start dating next. You know he's like I'll do it soon, I'll do it soon. Six months go by, one year go by, and they have no idea that you're a devoted believer in Christ.

Speaker 2: 2:33

Lord have mercy.

Speaker 1: 2:34

How many times have we seen that?

Speaker 2: 2:35

Over and, over and over again. It seen so many girls, women like start talking to a guy. They really like him and my first question to them like girls that let me speak into their life? My first question is is he a believer? Cause we ain't got time to waste if he ain't wasting time.

Speaker 2: 2:55

We're not wasting time. And I had someone that I was talking to a few months ago and I said, girls, you believe? Her Like, cause we're not wasting time on him. And she was like, yeah, he believes, well, fast forward. A few months later and he did believe, but he also believed in this thing and that thing and this thing and that thing, cause we live in California and people believe in a lot of things, all kinds of things.

Speaker 2: 3:16

And so it turned out that it was very disappointing that he didn't have the same beliefs as this young lady, didn't have the same beliefs as this young lady, and I was so hurt for her because she wasted her emotions, her time and her heart on this guy. But it has to be like you have to be so clear about your values and to not like hide them, put them under, like put them behind a curtain and see, like do I want to tell him how much of a Jesus lover I am Like not tiptoeing around it.

Speaker 1: 3:46

I wouldn't really say that she wasted time, you know, cause obviously she's one of our listeners too Like I wouldn't say that she wasted time. Like I think she did a great job like making that a point in their relationship, to really talk about it and ending it once they realized they did not share that value.

Speaker 2: 4:03

Yeah, I hear you on that and I will say everything that we go through, every relationship we go through, we take something from it, right, we learn something from it. We learn things that we do want in the next one or we don't want in the next one. So I I'm I don't want to say wasted, you're right, but, as from a woman to a woman, there is a part of us that gets hurt every time something doesn't work out, and so that I'm an empath, me seeing my friend and her hurting from that, that's where I was like and I I don't, I didn't want to see you go through that. And so I think and again to that person, she didn't do anything wrong.

Speaker 2: 4:45

It was kind of the guy. Honestly, he wasn't really upfront about what he did believe in, all that he believed in. Um, but I think, just knowing that going in there with your values and that, no matter how much you like that person, because at the beginning you like that person so much, you don't want them to judge you, you don't want them to know like everything about you. So you kind of like, hold your cards close to your chest, a little bit of like, I'm just going to hold them right here and then I'll lay them out as we go. But knowing like that those values are what make you, you and you cannot undervalue how important they are.

Speaker 1: 5:20

I heard a guy, um kind of describe it like you know, imagine a table. You see a table, you use a table, you put your cup on it, you put your food on it, you eat on it, you do so many different things. You put your elbows on it, you rest on it, right. But that table is only standing because of the foundation, because of the legs, and it takes these legs to put it up and a lot of times we do not, we don't give shout outs right To the legs.

Speaker 2: 5:43

Shout out to those chair legs, shout out to the legs here on this table.

Speaker 1: 5:48

That's providing the foundation here for this table.

Speaker 1: 5:51

You just kind of use it, but if it wasn't for those legs, like that table would be wobbly, that table would be breaking or like we've seen that happen, we've seen chairs break and fall just because something happened to the leg. If something's wrong with the chair, it's not. Sometimes it's not really the base, it's the legs or it's not the seat. And one guy was saying, like you know, when it comes to dating, I love his perspective on it and I actually agree that. That's why I'm saying it is really determined, like, okay, the legs on which this table stands on.

Speaker 1: 6:19

You know, I heard a story of a guy that was dating this girl and he liked her. They were kind of hitting it off, felt really good, and he had to go back home to visit his family because somebody graduated. So he brings her with him to meet the whole family and the whole time he's kind of watching her personality, her temperament, her behavior with the relatives, how she was interacting with the mom, the grandparents, the cousins, because this guy really valued family and I don't remember if he really expressed to her how much he valued family, but that moment, that opportunity, gave it its chance for it to all come out. So the story ends up where she was on her phone the whole time. She was giving short answers, very service. She was never going deep, she was just trying to leave. She was trying to cling to him the whole time. She didn't really want to hang out with the relatives. The moment they landed and came back home, he broke up with her. And I love that story because I think so many times, man, we see people undervalue their values, they downplay it, they just compromise, they think it's not that big.

Speaker 1: 7:27

Maybe I can just let it go, I can change, I can keep it to myself, I'll change for this person. But you're not realizing like these are the legs that keeps these tables up. And so we've seen people cut off family members, which family should have been one of the greatest values, but because they did not determine that as a value, they let someone pull them from their family. Years later they're like man, something's going on with my family and it's like, no, that person that you was with like pull you from one of the foundations of what you stand on, which is family. So that's why we talked about do not undervalue your values, overvalue it.

Speaker 2: 8:01

And while we're talking about values, I values overvalue it. And while we're talking about values, I think it's important to talk about what can those values be right, like for us. We grew up in the church, so our relationship with jesus is a huge value for us, but there are other things like family, there are other things of like for us. We do not do well with liars. That is a value that if I meet someone who lies like I'm good, like no, thank you. I cannot settle for dating someone who's a liar or like cheats, the system, like those people that just like to be like oh, you can just do that.

Speaker 3: 8:38

And you get around that little thing Like crooks, like.

Speaker 2: 8:41

So those? Those are some values. Can you think of other ones that may be like outside of right, your religion and your choices of relationship, but like other values that you would want to consider to be really high and important?

Speaker 1: 8:55

in relationships. I mean, I got some values I ain't ready to share right now in front of all the people, some values that I don't think you've even heard them. What right?

Speaker 2: 9:02

we're gonna, we're gonna unveil them here.

Speaker 1: 9:03

I don't think you've even heard them. What Right we're going to? We're going to unveil them here.

Speaker 2: 9:06

I don't know what you're talking about, guys. I'm nervous. I don't know what he is talking about.

Speaker 1: 9:11

This ain't about us. This is about y'all.

Speaker 2: 9:12

That's listening, all right, so okay, so think about those values that are important to y'all. Yeah, like if someone has a habit that you cannot live with, that's a value. Like I have a value I can't live with that.

Speaker 1: 9:37

Yeah, Like for us, like you know, um, like both you and I, you know, we've been blessed enough to not come from broken homes.

Speaker 2: 9:44

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 9:45

Right. However, there are things in my family, things in your family, that was never really dealt with on both sides, right and right, and we've seen the fruits of it throughout the years, throughout the decades, and things like that.

Speaker 1: 9:55

But what we're saying is that gave us an opportunity to really evaluate our families, evaluate our parents and really determine to us, okay, what are things that we've seen them do, that we really enjoyed, that we want to adopt, and what are the things that we seem to do, that we're like I think I would do it a little bit different. So we really have to determine those things and I think for people that are dating man, especially when you're first dating, you have nothing to lose. I've said it before and I'll say it all the time Like you have nothing to lose at the top, like you have to really figure out okay, why am I even doing this? Am I dating someone that values marriage? Right, if you value marriage, if you value a home, if you value family, those type of things. Like, make sure that you're getting involved with someone that shares the same values as you.

Speaker 1: 10:42

And if they don't share your same values I'll say this in this same topic that's okay, but still voice to them what's important to you and you guys can talk and have an understanding of. If you're willing to let it go, if you're willing to adjust it, if you're willing to adopt new values. Like, bring understanding to it. But I'm like you ain't married to the person and you guys don't share the same values and you're not talking about it, you're not sharing it Like bro, just stop doing what you're doing. You know what I mean. So I do believe that that's one of the greatest. That's one of the greatest tips that we can give somebody that's dating, that's pursuing dating, that's trying to get back into the dating world, or parents that are trying to give advice to the kids that are dating, like don Don't drop your values, don't compromise.

Speaker 2: 11:22

You know what I mean Ready for number two. Let's do it All right. Number two is know who to listen to. So when we were talking about this, the concept is knowing who those important people are in your life before you start dating that you will allow to speak into your relationship. So, for instance, when I met Pierre, I had a mentor from my college and she meant a lot to me. I was very close with her. She meant so much to me and when I told her that I was telling Pierre to stop calling me, she straight looked at me. I believe it was Olive Garden in Columbus, Ohio, and said you're a freaking idiot.

Speaker 2: 12:04

That's crazy I believe is Olive Garden in Columbus, ohio, and said you're a freaking idiot. That's crazy. It's crazy, but it stuck with me, of allowing her to speak into my life and for her to be the one to be like. You have a guy that has everything you've ever wanted and you're telling him to stop calling you. So she was one of the people that I knew I could listen to, and so, before you get into a relationship or before you start dating, know who those people are. Usually it's not more than two or three people, right, right, and maybe it is a pastor, maybe it is a mentor, maybe it's your older sister, sometimes it can be your parents, sometimes it ain't. It just depends on your relationship with them.

Speaker 2: 12:42

But, knowing who those people are and who can speak into your relationship when you start dating someone.

Speaker 1: 12:49

Yeah, yeah, that's crazy. When we were dating like when we started pursuing each other, and I remember thinking like, okay, this girl could be the one there were three voices that I allowed to speak into the situation. And so, as we're saying this right, one of the greatest advices that we can give to someone that is dating is know who to listen to. Like just because she's your home girl, just because he's your homeboy, does not mean they're the person that gets to speak into your relationships, especially when it comes to dating and pursuing marriage. For me, I made the decision that the number one voice that I wanted to listen to was the voice of God.

Speaker 1: 13:28

And how do you hear the voice of God? First of all, it's through reading the word. It's through reading the Bible, it's submitting to him, it's talking to him daily. And talking to him is not just always words coming out your mouth. Sometimes it's you stop talking and listening. God speaks, he gives impressions, he gives thoughts, especially thoughts that would never come from you. Especially when you're walking with God, you're like man. Where did that thought come from? It's the Holy Spirit putting it in you. So I remember those thoughts started getting very strong and very heavy, and they weren't thoughts of like lust, they weren't sexual thoughts right, there were thoughts of like man, peace, thoughts of like pursuing life together. It was thoughts of care and genuine concern for you and I remember feeling a love for you and I knew that was coming from God. So the very first, first verse voice, the very first voice that I decided to.

Speaker 2: 14:16

I know I'm like I'm struggling. I was like wait.

Speaker 3: 14:18

What verse are we talking about?

Speaker 2: 14:20

I was like oh, what verse are we in?

Speaker 1: 14:23

I'm going to get my words right, y'all. So I'm going to say it really slow. Y'all know I be struggling sometimes. So the very first voice that I decided to listen to was a voice of God. The second voice that mattered to me was my mom. Actually, and not because I'm a mama's boy, I am a mama's boy, I was always a mama's boy. I love my mom. We had a good relationship, you know, but it was actually because she walked with God, she walked with the Lord. That woman knew him. So I knew she knew him. Yeah, so I knew like when she was talking, she was talking from care concern she had. She didn't care if you were black or if you were white or if you were a city girl or a country girl, like she didn't care anything. She just knew. Like okay, god put this in my heart, so I respected her and I respected her relationship that she had with God that I decided I'm like okay, she's going to be the second voice that I allowed to speak into my relationship with you.

Speaker 1: 15:14

The third voice that I allowed to speak into my situation was my youth pastor at the time. You know, rest in peace. It's been about 10 years since he's passed away and I still think about him quite a bit because he left such a huge impression on my life. If you've ever served with me, if you ever served with my team you served under my leadership Like, if you've met this guy, you'd you would know where all my style of leadership comes from, and I love him. His name was Nolan and he was my youth pastor and I remember him speaking to it. I remember him asking like he used to call me Petey. He'd be like well, petey, you know I met her and you know she sounds like she has her head on her shoulders, sounds like she's pursuing God. It sounds like you really like her. It sounds like you guys have the same things in common, right. So I remember him speaking to it. I didn't. I had other people in my life at that time. I had friends, best friends. I had four siblings. My dad noticed I didn't put him on the list, right, I had my, my, my senior pastor at the time, but I chose the people that I decided to speak into my situation.

Speaker 1: 16:11

Listen, you guys sometimes let too many people speak into what you're going through. You know, I was telling someone the other day it's like if you're an athletic. Or if you're a football player or a basketball player and your mom says, son, I'm going to get you a coach for you to learn how to play basketball, and your dad's like I'm going to get you a coach. So now you get two different coaches trying to train you on basketball. One is like here's what we learned in Europe, and the other one's like here's what we learned in Brazil. You know what I mean? I'm like okay, who's right or wrong? No, they're. Both have different methods and different approaches to the situation. So I think sometimes a lot of us get confused because we allow too many people to speak into our situation and they're not in alignment. So the three voices were all in alignment with the one voice. So that's why we say one of the greatest tips we can give to you guys is know who to listen to.

Speaker 2: 16:58

And it doesn't mean, and it doesn't have anything negative towards the people in your life that are close to you that you don't give that space to. You can have. You had plenty of siblings, you had best friends, you had people that were very close to you, but they were not those top three and so it didn't mean any negative to those relationships in your life at that time. They just were not the top three that were the most important and were given that privilege to speak into your life.

Speaker 1: 17:31

Yeah, I had some people in my life at that time that was against us dating, right. That was against us being together, right. I won't say who they are, I won't say what they said, because that doesn't matter right now. All that matters is I made a decision to say I love you, I care for you, you're this in my life, but I don't receive those things. So sometimes we have to learn to just not open up the door to some people to speak into your situation. Don't even open up the door.

Speaker 1: 17:56

I have people that come to me all the time. They say man, I've started confessing some stuff. I was going through this to someone else and they gave me some advice and now I'm tripped up. I don't know what to do. I'm confused and in my head I'm just like why are you opening up to all the wrong people? You know that we can give to anybody, especially if you're dating right now, like dating that person that could be the one. That's a very delicate situation, for sure. Don't allow everyone to speak into it, even if they love you, even if they care for you. You know what I mean.

Speaker 2: 18:24

All right, before we get to number three, hold on pause. We're going to get to number three in a second. But if you have really been liking these conversations, conversations don't forget to like, subscribe, comment below. We're always in the comments talking back to y'all. And also, don't forget about the new life collection. It is available. There is a link and it is the old life has passed away and the new life has begun, so don't forget your merch.

Speaker 1: 18:50

It's super dope I love it so much. Statistics, analytics actually has been shown right now that 80 to 90 percent of our viewers are not subscribed. What are you guys doing? Just?

Speaker 2: 19:01

click the button.

Speaker 1: 19:02

Just hit the button. Don't you like the sound of my voice right now? Or should I use my Haitian accent?

Speaker 3: 19:09

Ips, ips. My name is Pierre Pidet Junior. You are now listening to the let's dig the podcast. The podcast. So Today we have a discussion To yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1: 19:27

Anyways, yo, what are you guys waiting for? Just hit the subscribe button, hit that like button. It's gonna show the algorithm that people really like this conversation and send it to somebody. What are you guys waiting for? And yes, I won't elaborate the algorithm that people really like this conversation and send it to somebody. What are you guys waiting for? And yes, I want to elaborate more on that shirt.

Speaker 1: 19:41

If you guys do not know, that is our shirt, that we've designed. We've designed it. You see, it's the old and the new. The old is crossed out.

Speaker 1: 19:49

The reason why God gave us that vision because I really wanted us to design something that was a product that would be the testimony of those who believe in God. Right, you know, we all have a story. We all have a testimony, things that we've gone through but we all have a new story who God has called us to be right. And a lot of times in this world, people tend to see us for who we were, but God sees you for who you are and that's why we have this shirt. So in the back of the shirt it's the scripture. It's 2 Corinthians 5, verse 17. It basically says this means that anyone who belongs to Christ is a new person. The old is gone and the new is here, so yo, the link is available. Hit that link. It's on Shopify. Get it for you, get it for someone else and if you're having a hard time even sharing your story about what God has done for you, this shirt is a great conversation starter.

Speaker 2: 20:37

For sure, all right, you ready.

Speaker 1: 20:39

Yeah, let's go.

Speaker 2: 20:40

Number three All right, number three is Drum roll, please. Oh, do you want to do one and two to remind everybody? No, oh.

Speaker 1: 20:47

I'm just like wait, where are we? No-transcript. Don't lose yourself, All right. Keep who you are. Don't forget who you are. This third one is the biggest one because for us, we learn later on in our relationship that we should have talked about this earlier in our dating life.

Speaker 2: 21:18

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 21:18

Right, we compromise certain things, especially you like in our early stages. There are certain things that you forgot, you compromised or you just put to the side because I in that moment was in the light or I in that moment was doing really big, so you forgot who you were for. I mean 10 years plus.

Speaker 2: 21:33

For sure I lean and I've talked about this in our other episodes of what it means to be a wife and I am just naturally more of a supportive wife. Submission is really easy to me. Like the Bible says wives submit to your husbands Check, Got it. That's very easy for me. But after 10 years of marriage I realized I had actually submitted even who I am and the gifts that God's put inside of me, and realized that it wasn't in the sense of um, it wasn't like a conscious decision that's what I'm trying to say. It wasn't like a conscious decision of like, oh, I'll just become nothing and stand right here and let Pierre do all of it. But it was so natural.

Speaker 2: 22:17

You're a strong personality, You're a strong man, so it was really easy for me to just let you lead and I'll just take a backseat, I'll take care of the kids or whatever. Like, go ahead, babe. Like go, do you? Um. So I think. But this is for men and women in dating. It is so easy because you want to be compatible and you want to connect with that person you're dating.

Speaker 2: 22:39

So, you, you wiggle the lines a little bit. You think like, oh, I really like doing that, but they don't like to do it, so it's fine.

Speaker 2: 22:48

It's not a big deal. I would challenge you to think about is that going to be a big deal in 10 years when you don't do that anymore? Because there were things in my life that I would say, oh, I put it on the back burner or I just put it back there, it's fine. But it did, over time, make a difference of, like, oh, I really do love doing that, or that really is a gift that God's put on my life and so, knowing what those things are, so if there's something that comes up and you're like, oh, they don't really like going hiking and it's fine, I just do it by myself.

Speaker 2: 23:20

If you are dating for long-term, is that something that will bother you in 10 years, that your spouse won't share this time of hiking with you or whatever it may look like? You know, putting this, the perspective of fast forward 10 years, does this impact how I feel about this decision? So knowing that, like that might be something that's part of me, that's really important and I want whoever ends up being my spouse to honor that and to be a part of that with me.

Speaker 1: 23:48

Yeah, yeah, that's so cool, man. I think too, like while people are dating or pursuing it, like going into those first dates, second, third, fourth date, like sharing about yourself and the things that are inside of you, like we talked about, this kind of connects to the first tip of your values, but it's very different. The values are more foundation things that mean a lot to you, things that matter to you, who you are, right. Those are the things that you're pursuing in life, those are the dreams that you have, those are the visions that you have, those are the businesses that you want to start, the books that you want to write, like the podcasts that you want to launch, like the songs that you want to write, the things that you want to pursue and like the places that you want to travel, the dreams that you have, those are the things that make up really who you are.

Speaker 1: 24:35

And I think so many times in relationships, especially in the dating world, that some people are afraid to share, like the things that are about themselves, or some people also hide certain things about their temperaments or their behaviors. Because, as we're saying, don't forget who you are, keep yourself, remember who you are. We're not just talking about itemized things or materialistic things. We're talking about personalities. We're talking about temperaments and behaviors. Right, if you got a loud laugh, a laugh that you get kicked out of movie theaters, hey, man, stop hiding that. Laugh, man, let your partner hear that laugh.

Speaker 2: 25:09

That's true. They got to know what they're signing up for you know what I mean. I mean you knew what you were signing up for when you saw my car in college.

Speaker 1: 25:15

Like you, know what I'm saying. Like Danny Lee, when I first met her, you guys remember like she wanted to be Puerto Rican and she was always getting these tans. So when I met her and then she had a Puerto Rican best friend too, so she's always talking about hey, I was like I'm like, oh snap, Got me a little country, Puerto Rican girl.

Speaker 1: 25:34

I'm like this is, this is weird. So then we get married and the tan starts to fade and I'm like, hey, what's happening with your skin? Like what's going on? I thought you were. You were portary, did you just?

Speaker 2: 25:46

catfish me, bro. I didn't. You used to say that and I'd get so defensive I'd be like you married a white woman, man y'all when I look back at the pictures I straight because we we got together when tanning beds were very important it was jersey shore, like snooki days, like all my millennials know who I'm talking about.

Speaker 1: 26:06

Like tans were the tan of tans there we go I did catch catfish, you it's fine because I I love you and I fell in love with you, but what I'm saying is the point of what I'm saying is like don't hide, don't like cover suppress those things that are who you are, your personality, like remember who you are, man, because the thing is, if you're trying to be somebody else, that person that you're trying to impress, they are falling for someone that is fake, yep, it's pretentious, it's not a real person. And then one day it comes out or one day it explodes and you're like this is who I am, I've always been this person. On the other person defense, they're gonna be like I never saw this, I never saw this person right.

Speaker 1: 26:46

So it's not worth hiding certain things about your personality, your character, right, these temperaments, behaviors, just to try to impress someone. While you're dating, remember who you are, remember the things that are on the inside of you and know and remember the things that are the outside of you, because last thing you need is a person you're dating is the one that's shining light on your personality. Be like, oh my gosh, I just noticed you're so da-da-da-da-da, and now you're over here getting offended, right, but you should know that about yourself. That's happened to us plenty of times in our marriage where I would mention stuff. I'm like, babe, like you ever realize that you always do this, or like you're very and like sometimes you'd get defensive or it'd be years later like, yeah, I never knew that about myself and I get it.

Speaker 1: 27:30

There's certain things it's you, you live with it, so you don't realize it. It takes someone on the outside. But what I'm saying is, on the dating world, get to know yourself first, remember who you are, don't hide it, don't lose yourself and you'll have nothing to lose, just everything to gain. Man, you get to be in a relationship and there's freedom in that man.

Speaker 3: 27:50

Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 1: 27:52

So that's all we got, man.

Speaker 2: 27:52

That's all we got. So I'm going to go from the top so that we remind ourselves and everybody else Hold on. I had to pull it up One, two, three Ready.

Speaker 1: 28:00

So the first advice we would give to anyone that is dating is don't undervalue your values, Like if it's your foundation. Make sure that those that you're in relationship with, those that you're pursuing, know the things that make who you are. The second advice that we would give to everyone is-.

Speaker 2: 28:20

Know who to listen to.

Speaker 1: 28:21

Know who to listen to. Not everyone who loves you or cares for you is the right person to speak into your dating life, right? The third advice that we would give is remember who you are. Remember the things that are inside of you and the things that are outside your personality, your character, your temperaments, your behavior. And I guarantee you guys, while you're dating like you will have a successful outcome. Even if that the person works out or they don't work out, you can walk away saying that, hey, I stood my ground, so shout out to our let's dig crew member that sent that message. I think it's a very cool question, very cool.

Speaker 1: 28:56

So also, we're doing this whole thing right now of like access anything. So, for those of you that don't know, we put out a message so you can send us a message on um, on um, apple, on Spotify. You'll see a link right there. It says send us a text message. You'll see it right here on YouTube. For those that are writing, you could write it in the comment If you're with us, if you've been with us on TikTok, like we respond on TikTok. Even Facebook too. We're on Facebook too as well. We watch it, we do monitor it and we do comment back and, most importantly, to Instagram too as well. You can send us a DM, send us a comment like access, anything. We don't have a bunch of answers, but we really just have insight and experience to share with you guys, man.

Speaker 2: 29:35

So I got All right. Let's dig, crew. We love you. We hope that this helped you know a little bit more of what you're going into when you're dating. And, all in all, dating is an exciting time in your life. Enjoy it, make wise decisions, but it's an exciting time. We look back at those times of us dating and it's some of the best memories. So go into it knowing who you are, knowing who you're going to listen to and knowing your values and we love y'all. Let's keep digging.